NARODILI JSME SE VE ŠPATNÝ DOBĚ?

Čím to je, že v dnešní době je tolik lidí, co se nechce vázat a žijí radši single život? Slyším to snad od každý svý kámošky, který nevyšel vztah, že důvodem tohohle krachu je, že ten dotyčnej se nechce vázat nebo že ještě není na vztah připravenej.

Jak je možný, že v době, kdy byli naši rodiče a prarodiče v našem věku, byla většina z nich už manželé a vychovávali děti – nás. Nikdo tenkrát neřešil, jestli je to moc brzo a jestli jsou na to připravení. A kdybych šla ještě dál, tak ještě předtím než ty děti měli, bylo prostě normální chodit na rande a scházet se někde venku. Nikdo neřešil to, jestli když začne s někým chodit, tak přijde o svojí svobodu nebo jestli je na to připravenej. Bylo to tak krásně jednoduchý, že když se ti někdo líbil a bylo ti s někým dobře, tak ti dva spolu prostě byli. Nebo to aspoň zkusili.

Tak proč je to dneska tak jiný a neosobní? Můžou za to sociální sítě a seznamky? Opravdu je pro lidi lepší si s někým jenom psát místo toho, aby si šli popovídat nad šálkem dobrýho kafe nebo skleničkou vína? A vážně lidi baví si vybírat svoje potenciální protějšky na seznamce jenom podle fotky, místo toho aby se koukali venku kolem sebe a oslovili se navzájem? Vždyť takhle se z toho vytratilo všechno to kouzlo. Kouzlo toho okamžiku, kdy nevíte, jestli vám ten, na koho se usmějete, úsměv oplatí nebo ne. Nebo jestli se vám ještě někdy naskytne příležitost oslovit toho krásnýho kluka (krásnou slečnu), když se k tomu teď neodvážíte?

Pro hodně lidí je prostě jednodušší to všechno prožívat jenom virtuálně, protože jim nehrozí to, že by je naživo mohl někdo odmítnout. V tý virtuální realitě je to přece jenom něco jiného, stačí kliknout na jedno tlačítko a dotyčná osoba, která vás ještě před pěti minutama zajímala, ale z nějakého důvodu vás odmítla, se ztratí někde v černý díře tohohle virtuálního vesmíru, aniž byste tomu museli čelit tváří v tvář. Nemluvě o tom, že si mohou z „katalogu protějšků“ v minutě vybrat další model, který by se jim líbil a mohou vše zkusit znovu a s čistým štítem. Jak jednoduchý.

Ale takhle to přece fungovat nemá. Nebo aspoň ne v mým světě.

Neříkám, že jsem nikdy nic z toho, co výš popisuju, nezkusila. Jasně, že jo, ale prostě vím, že to není nic pro mě. Je to na mě všechno moc hraný a nespontánní.

A tak přemýšlím, co je ten pravej důvod k tomu, proč to vlastně v dnešní době takhle je.

Vážně je to tím, že se tolik z nás nechce vázat a nechtějí přijít o svojí svobodu, protože je tolik možností, který máme a chceme vyzkoušet? Není to spíš tím, že si myslíme, že může přijít ještě někdo lepší, než je ten, s kým je nám teď hezky a s kým jsme sehraná dvojka? Že vlastně pořád chceme něco víc, že donekonečna můžeme vybírat z toho pomyslnýho „katalogu protějšků“, ale nedochází nám, že pak taky nemusíme mít nic? Protože takhle to v mnoha případech prostě dopadá, uvědomíme si, co jsme měli a jak moc to pro nás bylo důležitý, ale už to třeba nemusíme získat zpátky.

Nebo je to tím, že se jednoduše bojíme? Už jsme se několikrát spálili a teď se bojíme otevřít se něčemu novýmu a neznámýmu, ale vlastně strašně hezkýmu. V srdci víme, že je to pro nás krásná příležitost, ale v hlavě si vymýšlíme milion důvodu, proč to není dobrej nápad. A protože je dneska všechno tak strašně individualistický a lidi se naučili být samostatní, tak u nás hlava vítězí nad srdcem. A možná i proto, že když jsme sami, tak nám přece nemůže nikdo ublížit.

Ale to je přece život. Zkoušet, milovat, nenávidět, padat a zase vstát, poznávat ostatní i sám sebe za všech možných situací. Nebýt jak kytka někde ve skleníku, která je sice krásná a neponičená, ale tak nějak umělá. Co se týče mě, rozhodla jsem se, že nejlepší je řídit se srdcem, být otevřená a nebát se dávat a přijímat lásku. Člověk se může spálit, ale taky může získat to, co mu psaní a seznamování se ve virtuálním světe nemůže nikdy dát. A za ten risk to přece stojí. A doufám a věřím, že v tom nejsem sama a že se čím dál tím míň lidí nechá vtáhnout do toho někdy sice jednoduššího, ale prázdnýho virtuálního světa.

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